I haven't posted anything for so long on this blog. *blows dust away**coughs coughs* But hopefully I will soon. A lot has happened since my last post. To simplify it, moved back to KL, got a job, sought for treatment in KL, resigned from job and now back in Brisbane (???) while still looking for a new job. I'm only here for a short vacation, like 2 weeks supposedly, but umm, I've extended it for a week now and might just extend it for another week and make this trip like a month's stay #ripmoney
Three things that have immensely changed ever since I moved back to KL; lifestyle, health and my motivation. I've also had a lot of really low lows and some really high highs. Hint: me going insane and me finally doing things I've wanted to do. But I'll keep that for a later post. I started doing meditation and it has helped reduce my anxiety and get a good night sleep. I've also lost my abs 😭 but that's because of me not working out at all. But I hope I'll include working out in my daily routine after this.
Before I leave, I want to share with you something that has been bringing me down these past few months, and it still gets to me until today. I always overthink about what others will/might think of me. In turn, it brings myself down. Like, really dooooown. But I can't help it because in the environment I was in, people talk about each other behind their backs and they gossip about each other. Oh you know, office gossip. I couldn't trust anyone although initially they said I could. It can be really scary when the thoughts consume me because I'm always assuming stuff and jumping into conclusions, and IDK if it's true or not. What if it's not? Then I'll feel bad for overthinking and for assuming things about everyone. But then, what if it's true? Oh, that's painful. It feels like you got stab in your heart by someone you look up to and someone you thought you could trust. What's worst? When you did something wrong to someone and instead of telling you that you hurt them, they talk about you behind your back and the ostracism slowly starts to feel, and be seen, visible. I am a person who is really scared of confrontation because of the flurry of thoughts that'll come in.